As If He Needs Something Else To Be Afraid Of

Jun 192013
 

Thor has had this terrible obsession lately:  chewing on garbage bags.

It actually started out with him finding anything that resembles a food wrapper or plastic baggie, dragging it to the rug in front of the front door (which just so happens to two feet away from my bedroom door), and chomping the heck out of it.

Usually at 2 am.  Sometimes 3:27 am if he’s had a particularly busy day and was a wee bit tired.

This has since escalated to chewing on the part of the garbage bags that fold over the edge of the garbage cans.  To say that this drives me crazy is putting it lightly, because there is no word to describe the shredded, slobbery mess that remains when he is done.  Not to mention that I’m sure it’s not great for his digestive system.

So when I went shopping the other day I tossed around the idea of getting him some kind of chew toy from the dog supply section at Wally World.  First I thought about pig ears because I remember how much our dog Tipper used to love those things, but then I dismissed that idea because I would just be confirming that Thor was, in fact, a reincarnation of Tipper.

Not that that would have been a bad thing, but it wasn’t what I was setting out to  do on that particular day.

* Side note:  Ever notice that the selection for cat toys is about 1/1000 the amount that is available for dogs?  There should be a petition against this sort of favoritism.  

There were bungee toys, things with feathers, miniature mice that could only been seen under a microscope and other nonsensical items that would entertain the normal feline (of which Thor is not), but nothing that could be considered a “chew” toy.

Not wanting to leave empty handed and possibly feeling just a little generous, I decided to get something for the silly cat (as if he didn’t already have 497 toys already, of which most are under the bed).

This seemed to fit the bill quite nicely.  It was unique to anything that he already has and the tail looked like something he could chew on that might possibly take his mind off of plastic.

The real coolness factor of this particular toy was that when you tossed it or jolted it even a tiny bit it squeaked just like a mouse being tortured buy a cat.  And it’s eyes lit up.

Surely Thor would love this thing!

Nope, he was scared to death of it.

I do have to give him credit though.  He did paw at it once.  But then the eyes started flashing and it started squeaking and he took off like his tail was on fire.

Maybe I should put it by the garbage can.

 

Weirdest Pedicure Ever

Jun 122013
 

The deity that lives beyond the clouds and past the sun, who placed me in this lifetime, has given me many wonderful attributes.

I’ve also been blessed with some oddities also.

Some have been a thorn in my side that I’ve either just learned to accept, while others keep making their presence know every so often, granting them PITA status in my life.

One that has plagued me for the better part of the last 40 years are a couple of these little piggies.  The largest ones on each foot to be precise.

I’ve always had “ugly” toes, ones that if you doll up with pretty paint and fasten glittery shoes to only highlight their less-than-glamorous persona.  Good thing I’m a low-maintenance type of gal and don’t give two flips about that king of stuff.

But what I do care about is being pain free, and those little oinkers weren’t making it easy by constantly growing their nails “into” my toes instead of out like they were supposed to.  And apparently that wasn’t good enough for them so they started curling inward while increasing the thickness of their body.

It really was quite gross.  And painful.  And I finally decided to do something about it.

Enter into the picture the most fabulous podiatrist in the world.  After I explained to him the suffering I’d endured for all these years (along with the personal non-surgical procedures I’ve had to preform on those little lovelies to keep them in line) I was offered several options, of which I took the second-to-the-last extreme.

Yep, took them puppies right off (The nails, not the toes.  Thought I should clarify for those of you throwing your hands to your mouths and gasping).  Well, that was after he shot me up with a ton of numbing stuff which promptly wore off as I was pulling into the driveway an hour later.

I’ll spare you the “after” photo.

You’re welcome.

Worst-case scenario is that they’ll grow back just like they were before and I’ll be faced with the most extreme choice of surgery (which is a little gory and I won’t give you all the details).  There is no best-case scenario because that’s the way my toes are I’ll likely have to face this again.

So for now, I think I’ll just buy some bright red nail polish and paint the rest of my toes to match and maybe nobody will notice the difference.

 

Pizza Burgers

Jun 102013
 

We’re gonna pull another one out of the pile of favorite-recipes-that-my-momma-used-to-make.

And what is not surprising about this recipe is that is was clipped out of some newspaper.  I think she found all of her best recipes that way.

This time I had the luxury of taking some step-by-step photos because it’s such a fun recipe that even little ones would have fun helping you put it together.

Let’s start with the cast of characters:

  • 4 large hamburger buns
  • 2/3 cup evaporated milk
  • 1 1/2 pounds lean ground beef
  • 1/2 cup fine cracker meal
  • 1/4 cup finely chopped onion
  • 1 tsp garlic salt
  • 2 tbsp grated Parmesan cheese
  • 8 oz can tomato sauce
  • 3/4 tsp oregano
  • Mozzarella cheese

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Combine the evaporated milk (I know, weird ingredient), ground beef, cracker meal (in this century I think it’s called cracker crumbs), onion, garlic salt, and Parmesan cheese in a large bowl.

See, kids could have fun doing that!  It’s messy and stuff!!

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Split the hamburger buns in half and toast them.  A couple of mine went a tad long… oopsie!

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While those are toasting, combine the tomato sauce and oregano in a small bowl.

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Equally divide the meat mixture on top of the buns.  Make a well in the middle of the mixture.

It’s gonna look like a lot of meat (and it is) but don’t worry, it will all turn out just fine in the end.

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Take the tomato sauce/oregano mixture and spoon into the wells.

Pop them in a 425 degree oven for 20 minutes.

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As you can see, my oven ran a little hot and the buns suffered the consequences.

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Sprinkle some shredded mozzarella cheese over the tops and bake again until melted (3 – 5 minutes).

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Yummers!

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In a perfect world the buns won’t turn out so crispy on the outside, but I actually like the “crunch” of them when I take a big bite.

Also in a perfect world I would be able to take better photos, but whatcha gonna do, eh?

Seriously though, this is one of those great last-minute what-am-I-gonna-make-for-supper-tonight dishes that takes less than 40 minutes from start to finish.

Unless, of course you have little ones helping you.  I’d give some extra time for that but it would be so worth it!

 

I’d Marry You Again

Jun 082013
 

With tiny tears that glistened,my eyes were fixed on you,
and thinking of the life we’d share we softly said, “I do”

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Our hearts were knit together
from the time that we first met,
and memories were gathered
that we never will forget.

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While daily living life with you,
you saw the real me,
and still you chose acceptance,
a lifelong mystery.

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With many happy times gone by
and others when we cried,
some days we’d share so endlessly,
while other days we’d hide.

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With all the ups and downs we’ve had
in learning to be friends,
I know that in this heart of mine,
I’d marry you again.

:::

Happy Anniversary Sweetheart

♥♥♥

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